UPDATE

Who knew that I could be like those fairy tale princesses? Who knew that life would hand you what you asked for? Aaron called me back and it was amazing. Very few people could ever understand what transpired tonight. As amazing as it was...I'm going to keep the details to myself. Just know that I am very happy, content, and amazed at where this twist in my life's road is going.

I look forward to seeing where this goes. I'm glad that there is no longer the wonder of if he was thinking of me or if he wondered about me. I'm tired now and need to get some shut eye..

Last thought for tonight:

What do you dream about when what you have dreamt about for years is now reality!

Long Time Coming

Let me give you a little background for those of you that don't know or don't remember....

Back about 9 or 10 years ago, I was helped in life by an amazing woman named "mama Deborah". She had a daughter named Trella and a son named Aaron. Trella and I became best friends and Aaron and I eventually dated. I have been in love with him ever since. We broke up like most relationships do. The only problem, is I never stopped loving him. Never.

I have spent the last 7 years or so looking for them. Every time I would look for them I would find Aaron's name and a number. I never called it. Who knew where he was in life or what he was doing. I really didn't ever want to barge into his life. But part of me always wondered. I have thought about him, dreamt about him, written about him, and always wondered what I would do if I found him or talked to him.

This past weekend, while catching up with some old friends from high school, I found an email address for a woman named Deborah. I emailed her and asked if she was my mama deborah. I received an email today saying that she was mama Deborah and she still has the picture of Brittany and her grandchildren. She left me her number.

After I picked my heart up off the floor, I called her. We both cried and cried. We talked and gave each other the reader's digest version of what has happened in the last 7 years. Finally we got around to Aaron. While we were talking, he apparently called her. She told me to call him right away.

I spent several minutes looking at the phone number she gave me. I had waited years for this phone call. I wanted to say so much and yet I wanted to say nothing at all. I desperately wanted to make the call, and I never wanted to make the call. Here I had the number for someone that I had loved in my head for all these years. He is the one when all the girls are sitting around talking about "The one that got away" I would think about. Didn't matter who I was dating at the time. Even my aunt jo and I had talked about this. At the beginning of every relationship, I would dream about Aaron. I knew we weren't the same people we were 9 years ago, but what would he be like. Had he thought of me just once? My hands shook as I dialed the number. I prayed that somehow, the answering machine would answer and I thought about hanging up, then I realized, I had waited all these years for this..I had played thousands of conversations in my head for this very situation. He sounded shocked to hear me. I'm not sure it was a good shock, but I'm not sure it was a bad shock. He was with some friends and couldn't talk right then and took my number.

So pretend that you have waited a million minutes for a conversation to take place and then tell me not to read too much into anything. Maybe he was in shock and where as I've had years to plan this conversation, he had seconds, because he hadn't thought about me. Maybe he really didn't want to hear from me again? Maybe he had waited as long as I had for the conversation and just didn't know what to say. Who knows.

So my very complicated thought for tonight is this.....

1. Who is your one that got away?
2. Would you contact them if you could?
3. What would you say?
4. What do you think they would say to you?
5. Is it possible that you can spend so much time building someone up in your head that you are actually a little sad when the moment comes to talk to them again because the thoughts and dreams you have had are coming to an end.

Aaron is no longer the mystery man from my past. I don't yet know if I should have kept him that way, or if I did the right thing by trying to bring it to my present.

Love is a crazy thing......

catching up

As promised there is a lot to catch up on.....
My children treated me to an amazing Mother's day last weekend. Isaiah's class made keychains with their names on it and a card with their handprints. It was beautiful and made me cry. Brit made me three cards at school. One took my breath away. It was laminated and I could tell how much work she put into it. It was a Time Magazine Exclusive Mother of the Year. It had preprinted pages inside that she had to fill in the blanks and I know she worked so hard on the "perfect" handwriting. She did a great job. The morning of Mother's Day, she made me pop tarts in bed. She walked Devon without complaining and made herself a bowl of cereal. Then when Isaiah woke up, she made him a bowl of cereal. I stayed in bed and relaxed. When I got up, Britt asked if she could do the dishes and she helped with laundry. It was a great day!!
My computer finally came and it is amazing! It's a pretty green color and I'm very happy to have it! Thanks Dad!
Work has been insane! I have worked way too many hours the last two weeks and am incredibly exhausted. I have even been bringing stuff home to do. I'm feeling a little under the weather right now, but I'm sure a good night's sleep will help!
Right now Britt is out roller skating with a friend and Isaiah is taking a nap....I think I will join him.

"What the Hail"

I promise, I will update everyone on what is going on. But I only have a few minutes right now, so I thought I would tell you the funniest quote to come out of my child's mouth this weekend! (FYI my new laptop will be here soon and I will be able to update more often!!! Have I told you, it's green?!)
So this weekend, we had storms. Lots of them! Thunder, lightning, rain, and wind. Then my son hears a ping ping ping and wants to know what it is. So we look outside and I see hail. Neither of my children have seen hail before. B said "look mommy it's snowing!" In Charleston, in May, (note to self: need to work on weather with B this summer!)
I said "No guys, it's hail. Little balls of rain that fall from the sky (note to self: need to research exactly what hail is). So Isaiah very quickly with his southern draw says.....

WHAT THE HAIL?

Hmmmm....kids say the darnedest things!!

I will let everyone know how the new job stuff and mothers day and everything else is going very soon!!!!

The Miley Cyrus Fiasco

I guess as a mother of a huge Hannah Montana fan, I might as well make my comments and thoughts known.

If by chance you live in a bubble and do not watch TV, listen to the radio, have children. or use the Internet (which means you aren't really reading this!) then you know what I am talking about.

There are apparently three sets of pictures going around that are causing a big stir.

The first are personal pictures that Miley took with friends where she is pulling down her shirt revealing a green bra and another where she is lifting her shirt showing her midriff.

The second picture is seen below. This is THE Vanity Fair picture that is causing a stir.

The problem alot of people are having with this is that Miley knowingly took this picture. She has stated that the pictures where artistic and she liked them. Then after the backlash, she says something completely different. I have respected Billy Ray as a father and the control and respect he has of his daughter. According to the Internet and other news sources, Miley's parents are saying that the photographer wanted to take one last picture. She has said that she told Miley's parents the last picture would possibly make her father nervous to be around for. Would you leave??? Absolutely not. If it would make me nervous for someone to take a picture of my daughter in front of me, do you think that I would let them take it to show the whole world? Absolutely not! It's common sense.

The second set of pictures are the ones that Vanity Fair took with Miley and her father. The media is portraying these as looking too seductive to be a father and daughter picture.

Ahh...yeah! I love you dad....but I don't think we would ever take a picture like this!

I understand that celebrities are entitled to their own lives and privacy. Miley and her family know by now that just about every little girl (ages 4 and up) love her, want to be her, and do everything they see her do. Miley has been praised for being wholesome, clean cut, and at least around our house, a young female that B and her friends can look up to. I managed to keep the Vanessa Ann Hudgens (High School Musical) nude picture scandal away from B, but this one is a little different. I sat down and explained to B that just like Hannah Montana's song says..."everyone makes mistakes" and "nobody's perfect". I explained to her that the pictures (the private ones and the semi naked Vanity Fair pictures) are not ok. No little girl, or even teenage girl, should be taking these types of pictures.

How many more scandals of people taking inappropriate pictures (for personal or publicity reasons) are there going to be before Hollywood realizes the moral collapse in society that they are aiding? Yes, parents are responsible. In today's society where parents are not "parenting" but allowing a television, a video game, an MP3 player, and the Internet to raise their child, think how different it would be if the messages being sent were wholesome.

Millions of parents now have to talk to their children about this situation and explain that Miley made a bad choice. The Cyrus family should have thought about all the little girls in the world that look up to her and are know going to think that pictures like this are ok.

I have been following a series on The Sovereign Grace blog about modesty and women. It has been very eye opening as a woman and the mother of a one-day-going-to-be-a...ttteenager. The series is a 7 part series based on the chapter "Modesty" from CJ Mahaney's forthcoming book Worldliness: Resisting the Seduction of a Fallen World. It studies the verse

I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes,

1Timothy 2:9

After reading some of the excerpt from Mahaney's series, Paul tells Timothy that the women in the congregation should not try to dress like the Roman court and prostitutes, with pearls and expensive clothes. Who says the Bible isn't relevant in today's society.......

Think of the celebrities that the media flashes on TV for little girls to look up to...

Brittany Spears??
Paris Hilton??
Lindsay Lohan??
Pussy Cat Dolls??

Really? Can we not find a morally sound, God fearing and loving Christian, young female for our daughters to look up to? Our little girls look to these people on how to dress, what to say, and how to act. Are we not concerned with the future of women in our society to stop this! The magazines and runways are full of stick thin models portraying the need to be thin and scantily dressed to our daughters. They are showing the young, beautiful, Hollywood as young partying women that drink and possibly do drugs, wearing little to almost no clothes.

On top of all this, they are even making dolls and toys selling "sexy" looks to younger girls. The Bratz dolls have been banned from my house. They look like little hookers. Yet they are just as popular to little girls a s Barbies. Go to any Walmart toy store and see, one side is Barbie, the other Bratz.

It's a scary world we are living in. Our little girls are growing up too fast. Even if we monitor our daughters, they are hearing this stuff at school, seeing little girls dressed inappropriate at school, or are playing with dolls like this at friends house.

I am a mother who is very disappointed in Miley and her family for what has happened. I understand people make mistakes, but this is not a mistake that I, as a mother, and a consumer, am likely to ignore. We, as mothers and fathers, have paid Miley and her family. We have been willing to buy her merchandise, do crazy things for tickets, and support her show. I expected a lot more for my money than this.

Well, that's me venting...



thought for today.....
Who is your daughter looking up to? In real life, and in the celebrity world!